trusting my instincts

Adoption is a beautiful thing.  Gaining a child without actually bearing the child.  That’s quite a word there…bearing.  No discussion of epidurals or episiotomies or epi-anythingelseforthatmatter.  You likely go home wearing the same clothes you came in wearing.  Most of your body fluids still a part of your body.  Just the normal sort of hormone things, not the raging pregnancy things.  Sometimes you are even blessed enough to adopt children that are eating solid foods independently, sleeping through the night and come fully potty trained. 

Research has shown that adoptive mothers can experience some of the same physiological symptoms of pregnancy that a biological mother experiences.  Many adoptive mothers successfully breastfeed their newborn babies.  We’re not currently looking to adopt a newborn, I’m okay with the condition of my hair, skin and nails….so I’m hoping for THIS ONE:

nest·ing [nest-ing]  in·stinct [in-stingkt]

Refers to an instinct or urge in pregnant animals to prepare a home for the upcoming newborn(s). It is found in a variety of animals (both mammals and birds) including humans.

In human females, the nesting instinct often occurs around the fifth month of pregnancy, but can occur as late as the eighth, or not at all . It may be strongest just before the onset of labor.

It is commonly characterized by a strong urge to clean and organize one’s home, and is one reason why couples who are expecting a baby often reorganize, arrange, and clean the house and surroundings.

If you know me at all you know that organization is not my strength.  My house is a mess, my car is a mess, my purse is a mess, my desk is a mess, etc.  Oh, I get by all right.  Some people think I’ve got it all together, and sometimes I do.  Until you open the closet, or the trunk or the drawer.  I go through spurts of organizational inspiration.  We have a file box now.   With files hanging in it.  And papers in the files.  Some of them are labeled.  Most of them are in the correct file.  And I hardly ever just open the lid and lay papers on top of the hanging files because I’m too lazy to put them in the correct file at that moment.  So, I’m looking forward to that nesting instinct which will guide me through the preparation of our home for our future child(ren).

pan·ic [pan-ik]

A sudden overwhelming fear, with or without cause, that produces hysterical or irrational behavior, and that often spreads quickly through a  group of persons or animals.

The emotion that might be is definitely creeping its ugly head into my life this weekend as we prepare for our first home visit which is scheduled for TUESDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is certainly one or the other that will explain my behavior last night.  When, at the end of a tiring work day, I chose to begin cleaning and preparing for our home visit next week.  Did I take down the disgusting curtains in the bathroom?  Did I scrub a scuff mark off the door frame?  Did I even bother to hang up the smoke detector that sits on the kitchen ledge?

No…in my panic, nesting, insanity…I scrubbed clean and disinfected the back of my dishwasher.

Oh, and I organized my kitchen linens, holiday dishes and measuring cups.

It’s gonna be a great weekend, folks.


11 thoughts on “trusting my instincts

  1. Forgot to ask…If you know…How long does the average adoption take in OK? It seems like things are really moving along!

    • Well, we keep learning things as we go, so this information could very well change. But, when Rob made the initial phone call to start everything…the coordinator said it usually takes 90 days to complete the background checks, homestudy and classes. Then it would be possible to have placement during the next 90 days. I’m sure there are a lot of variables in there but that is the general schedule of events.

    • Thank you, Charissa. You’re a great one to inspire adoption blog postings…congrats on your great day today!

  2. You’re right, adoption is a beautiful thing and I’m so excited to be witnessing the process through you guys. Share as much as you’d like, we’re enjoying it greatly! Also, don’t panic. You’ll get it all pull together perfectly by Tuesday. Can’t wait to hear how it goes!!!

  3. I loved this post. In terms of blogging, you just made a leap into awesomeness. I thoroughly enjoyed every bit.

    I hope they look at the back of your dishwasher. That way you won’t feel insane for doing it. Have a great weekend nesting!

    • Thanks, Molly. It means a lot coming from one of the first (maybe THE first?) blog author I ever met. Love you!

  4. You are a great writer/ blog author Kate!!! (Is that the right term?) = ) I look everyday to see if you have writen something new!

  5. Pingback: a series of *’s « While I'm Waiting

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